Starting IVF...or not

I'm not quite sure what to title this entry... I will never forget the day, Monday November 15, 2010 when my world literally fell apart. My cycle had started, and I went for my first ultrasound and bloodwork. Later that morning, while at work, I get a phone call from Dr. Chang. She told me that for some reason she had just gotten the result of our bloodwork from August 2010. Dr. Chang stated that my bloodwork had shown HIV antibodies. I was at work when she called. I had been expecting her to call and tell me that I would be starting birth control pills in preparation for IVF. I was upset, scared, shocked. I knew at that point that I would not be able to clearly hear anything else she had to say and asked her to call my husband. She agreed to do so.I only remember her saying something about seeing an infectious disease specialist at Cedar Sinai who does not take my insurance.



A million different things went through my mind. If this was true, how could I have gotten it? I was working per diem social work in the hospital ER, but had never come into contact with blood. If I did have it, had I given it to my husband? Over three months had passed between the test and being told this news.



I next called my husband. Dr. Chang had called him, but had not left a message. I could not stay at work and decided to go to the ER at the hospital I work per diem at- Henry Mayo. I know there are perks to being a hospital employee, and I couldn't have asked for better care. I had my bloodwork taken, and the results were negative. Dr. Sutter was very reassuring. On our way out of the ER, he told my husband, "Now go get her pregnant!" We celebrated with dinner and drinks.



The next day, my husband was on the phone with Dr. Chang when I came home from work. He put her on speaker phone. She spoke to me as if I was a child who had done something wrong. She told me that I had not been compliant with her directions, that the test from the hospital was not "good enough", and I "must" see the infectious diease specialist for further testing. According to Dr. Chang, she would not proceed with IVF unless I had the most definitive testing.



I went to see the specialist and paid $200 out of pocket. Dr. Geemee Chung was very sweet. She explained that there are some additonal labs to "completely" rule it out, but most likely this was a false positive.



Talk about a rollercoaster of emotions...I was not told I was completely in the clear until two days before Thanksgiving. When Dr. Chung called and told me the news, she had said she would call Dr. Chang as well. Since the last conversation where I was told I was not being compliant with her directions, I never heard from Dr. Chang again.